Why is NANCM a support group for Moms without custody? What about Dads without custody?

Answer: NANCM is a non gender based support group. It is open to both Mothers and Fathers who need emotional support dealing with the loss of their God Given right to be an active 50/50 part of their children’s life. It is also open to Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins and friends of the children involved; people who also are robbed of being able to maintain a relationship with the children involved due to the Custodial Parent not being willing to truly co-parent the children.

NANCM was created to let other Non-custodial Mothers know they are not alone (a large characteristic of a non-custodial Mom). Remember, NANCM was created by a woman who was raised by her Father and knows what a CRUCIAL role Father's play in their children's lives.

How did the Founder become a Non Custodial Mom?

NANCM was founded by a Mother who had a “move away” forced on her in 1998; a year after her divorce. After that year of practicing 50/50 joint custody, the Father gave less than 2 weeks notice that he was moving from Florida to Pennsylvania. Since there were no restrictions in the divorce papers prohibiting either parent to travel with the children, an emergency injunction was scheduled to keep the Father from taking the children out of state against the Mothers wishes. The quickest the hearing could be scheduled was for the day the Father planned on leaving with the children. After discovering that the Mother had been the primary care giver during the marriage, that there was a 50/50 visitation schedule being practiced since the divorce, and because the Mother and children had a very strong bond, the judge began to explain why the Father could not take the children to Pennsylvania with him. Additionally, it was proven in the hearing that the move was a voluntary move in regard to employment. The Father had requested the move with his company and had actually taken a demotion to transfer. The move to Pennsylvania was nothing more than an attempt to alienate the Mother from her children.

That's when things went terribly wrong. The Father's attorney pointed out a paperwork technicality; a Notary’s Jurat was not signed properly, therefore the Judge ruled that the injunction had to be dismissed and there was nothing “legally” keeping the Father from taking the children over state lines until the paperwork could be re-filed on Monday. But the Father left immediately; straight from the court house, without even letting the children say goodbye to their Mother. Once the Father had the children over state lines, the courts did nothing to help. The extent of help that the Mother received was attorney after attorney recommending making the Father look "unfit" by filing false allegations of abuse or neglect; something the Founder adamantly refused to do.

The most recent court order does state, “It is ORDERED, ADJUDGED and DECREED that: the parents shall share the legal and physical custody of their children.” But due to the geographical distance, the Founder faces all the same issues as a Non Custodial Mom; reduced to summer visitations and holidays; paying child support to someone whose salary is ten times her own, and having to deal with a former spouse's live-in girlfriend who consistently attempts to sabotage the children’s relationship with their Natural Mother; choosing to believe the lies that the Natural Mother "gave them up".

Does NANCM get involved in legislation or politics regarding custody issues? Do they help fight to get laws changed or to get corrupt politicians out of office?

No. NANCM is an emotional support group with 3 primary areas of focus. NANCM and its Board of Directors are not interested in getting directly involved with legislation or politics. That does not mean that individual members of NANCM are not involved in these aspects or do not care about these issues. NANCM’s only hope in this regard is that anybody who finds support and strength through NANCM is more effective and makes a bigger difference because they were able to better cope with their situation on an emotional level.

There is an area on the discussion boards which has been designated to discuss issues such as the Family Law Court system, case law, child support, etc.; however recruiting by outsiders to get NANCM Angels to sign petitions or join their cause(s) is not permitted without prior approval from the Board Owner or the NANCM Board of Directors. This rule is in place simply to ensure that all petitions put out for signing are legitimate and are in the best interest of PARENTS and CHILDREN, not one gender or the other.

How do I find contacts in my local area and how do I get listed as a Local Contact?


To find a local contact in your area, you may visit our

: Local Contact Home Page

Being listed as a Local contact for NANCM carries a lot of responsibility and numerous requirements. To be listed as a local contact for NANCM you must be a registered user who has been active on the boards long enough to be familiar with a lot of the current members. NANCM’s founder will not appoint any Local Contacts without first speaking with them on the phone a number of times and getting to know them better to ensure that they know the core principals of NANCM and whole heartedly believe in it’s Mission Statement.

If you meet the above requirements then you know who to contact to discuss the question further.

Is my contribution to NANCM tax deductible?

YES. NANCM is recognized by the IRS as a 501(c)3 tax exempt organization. Your contribution IS tax deductible, and you can be assured that all money collected is going right back into the Association to help with web site maintenance and other expenses directly related to running NANCM. Contributions are also going to assist Non Custodial Parents in various ways. Our Federal Tax ID number is 56-2499916



Finding this website was the best thing that has happened to me in a long time, I cannot express how happy I am that I am finally not alone in this situation anymore. Thank you all of you for just being there!!!!!!!!! HOORAY HOORAY HOORAY

"Hi Beverly ~ It was great to talk to you today...AND I forgot to say THANK-YOU!!!! for developing your web site for people like me.  When no one else was there ~ when no one "understood" how I felt ~ you and all of those wonderful non-custodial moms WERE THERE.  That is priceless.  You have a very special place in my heart and many other hearts for your hard work and compassion..”

NANCM has been my lifeline since I stumbled upon the website 4 months ago. The support, understanding and information has proved invaluable to me as I struggle with my NCM status.

" I found this website tonight. What a wonderful way to look for advice, support and a sounding board. For sooo long I felt as though I was alone. There is no way that anyone can understand the pain we feel unless they have experienced it themselves."

Sydney, NSW

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